“There is no coming to consciousness without pain.”
– C.G. Jung
Change. It is a word that we sometimes both long for and avoid. Change is hard. There is no doubt about it, when something isn’t going right in life we say, “I need a change.” We also tend to put change off until we are being forced to change something, or until we hit that wall, and realize that we just cannot keep going the same way that we were anymore.
Change, we want a lifestyle change.
Change, we want to change how we parent.
Change, we want our kids to change their behavior.
Change, we want our spouse to change.
Change, we want our relationships and friendships to change.
Change, we want to change the way we see ourselves.
Change, we want to change how others see us.
Change, change, change, change, the list goes on and on.
Making a change, or needing to make a change, can feel like a hard hit to our pride. It also seems like we often want changes in life, and changes take work. A lot of work, a lot of work that sometimes is hard to commit to. We often want things to have changed yesterday, and the process of change well, frankly, sometimes it can suck. Change doesn’t happen overnight, it takes time, hard work, practice, and believe it or not, failure. Change and perfection are just two words that do not seem to easily come together. You can perfect your change, but not without some failures, some hard lessons, and some setbacks here and there.
We are quickly approaching the “New year, New me” time again. The time that most of us make a commitment to change, and a week later say “Well, try again next year”.
We all struggle with change. Let me reiterate, change sucks. We often struggle with wanting change to be easy. We also tend to struggle with being hard on ourselves when we experience setbacks. Those setbacks do not mean that you or someone else in your life who is trying to change, is not trying any more. It just means that maybe they or us, needs a little more support, empathy, and compassion during that time. During times of setbacks, it is easy to let ourselves off the hook, to say we failed, to give up.
Remember, we are capable of change. We get to write our own story. We get to be what we want to be.
Don’t give up!
Believe in yourself!
Set yourself free!